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4 months ago ::
Jan 29, 2012 - 10:08AM
#1
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Hi, My daughter has this friend and has been her friend for a long time, lately she has been sitting with a new friend and her old friend tell her that she cannot be her friend if she is friends with this other kid and tells her that my daughter does not like her just because she made a new friends, my daughters friend is very bosy to my daughter and has in the past even went so far as to tell her what to wear, she calls other kids names and make fun of what they are weari g and such, tells my daughter who to talk to online and even told me not to acess my daughters facebook, would my daughters friend be considered a bully?
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4 months ago ::
Feb 06, 2012 - 12:44AM
#2
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Hi, My daughter has this friend and has been her friend for a long time, lately she has been sitting with a new friend and her old friend tell her that she cannot be her friend if she is friends with this other kid and tells her that my daughter does not like her just because she made a new friends, my daughters friend is very bosy to my daughter and has in the past even went so far as to tell her what to wear, she calls other kids names and make fun of what they are weari g and such, tells my daughter who to talk to online and even told me not to acess my daughters facebook, would my daughters friend be considered a bully?
I would consider your daughters so-called friend a bully. My daughter had a so-called friend like that, It only got worse. I now have to tell the school every year to make sure they are not in the same class. I would talk to the parents about her, hopefully for you it will help. It didnt in my case. I told my daughter and the girl that I no longer would allow them to be friends. I also told my daughter to ignore the girl as best she could, and report anything to the school and to me. Hopefully your girls situation will better, but stay on top of everything! I would also recommend talking to the school and bus transportation if they ride the same bus. My daughter has been bullied since kindergarten, children can be cruel. Only now (she is in 4th grade) is the bullying gone, and my once out going girl slowly getting back to herself. But I still monitor all very closely.
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4 months ago ::
Feb 07, 2012 - 1:40PM
#3
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I'll be honest. I have seen this sort of thing happen with my daughter and I'm going to call it a bully situation. This little girl is controling and demanding and it will just escalate in my opinion. My daughter is in second grade. She had the same classmate in kindergarten, first grade and now in second grade. I noticed in kindergarten that the kid was a handful. In first grade my daughter considered her a friend because she would follow us to the car everyday and ask us for a ride home. I started to see that the girl was not treating my duaghter very nice. We stopped giving her rides home and my daughter started sticking up for herself and distancing herself, even turned down a birthday invitation. This year the girl started pushing my duaghter. My duaghter actually told me she didn't feel safe in her classroom. The school was horrible handling the situation. I had to take control, my daughter needed me. I pulled her out of school until the situation was handled. That's the short version :) In the end I moved my daughter to another class and she is doing better than she ever did in the old class. Mom to mom advice would be to guide your daughter to make her own choices. Don't tell her she can't play with this girl. Explain that if she doesn't like the way she is being treated, she has choices. Roll playing is really good for your daughter. You can pretend to be the bully and she can try different ways to talk to the bully. We did this with my daughter and it helped her feel comfortable standing up for herself. Please let us know how it worked out. Tammy
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4 months ago ::
Feb 07, 2012 - 11:14PM
#4
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I don't care what you call it, I don't like it. When my daughter had a friend who started acting like this, I sat my daughter down for a little talk. We talked about what makes a good friend. Sometimes you do what a friend wants just to be a good friend, but you don't have to (and shouldn't) ALWAYS give in to her and do EVERYTHING that she says either. I also told her that its hard to loose a friend, but that just be what happens. She might have to decide if she realy wanted to give up other friends, or move on from this one. I explained to her that she didn't have to become enemys with her, and she could still try to be her friend anyway. I didn't want her to be mean, but I didn't want her to be mean to someone else either. I think she made the right decision in the end. The girl is still trouble, but my daughter has made some great new friends. I hope this helps, and you both get past it. Good luck
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4 months ago ::
Feb 12, 2012 - 1:07PM
#5
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I would absolutely consider her a bully. It seems she is trying to control your daughters every move and is negative towards her if she doesn't listen. It's a difficult situation with young girls but it's important to nip it in the bud, as it has a large possibility to only get worse. My advice: I would try to guide your daughter to make a overall decision on her own regarding keeping her as a friend or not. Sometimes demands backfire. But make sure to explain to her she is her own individual and should not have to do anything she doesn't want to. If she doesn't like how she is being treated she does NOT have to just deal with it. She can stand up for herself in a kind manner. Real friends don't treat each other that way. My sister is dealing with a similiar situation with her 14 yr old daughter and her daughter's best friend. Girls can be so harsh. I feel horrible because my neice is lost and has very little confidence in herself know.
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